hmmm.....

On faith: There was a time when I had a blind faith in the goodness of people.  But I have been pretty jaded. While I do try and see the good side of people and love them for it, I no longer have that unwavering kind of faith in people. For such faith to an extent comes with expectations, and people don't live up to expectations.  I have come to love people but no longer have faith in them. I love them for who they are but have no expectations. Even the closest ones, whom you've known all your life will break your faith. That is a fact. My faith in the higher power which has been a constant in my life has decreased.  On having my back: The other day, I closed my eyes and thought of people who had my back. Came down to two people. Used to be three, two from the family and one outside. But it is two. Its so important to have those people who have your back. And who assure you that they do in fact have your back.  On expectations: Living up to ...

Happy New Year everybody. Been sick for ten days now. Not fun.Oh well. Such is life. I am still thankful, still hopeful for everything around me. 

Gundari turned eighteen yesterday.  Made me think about what I did when I turned eighteen. I had a lovely birthday celebration at college. But the more memorable one was coming home and letting him cut the cake and sing. It's unfortunate that we didn't get to spend your growing up years together but you will always be in my thoughts and I will always wish you well. I love you, my dear nephew. :)

December makes me nostalgic. Reminds me of incidents, things, people from the distant and not-so-distant past. And reminds me of certain harsh realities. Certainties. Sinking my already almost drowning heart. It would be nice to have a control alt del key to some memories and even more for people from the past. 

My mom and dad lived in the same house with their respective families, before they got married at different points in time. I remembered that walking to the store beside where I stay today because I remembered a couple of times I came and waited for a friend at the same spot. And thought about how my current place is 'my place' to me and I haven't really thought of it as that friend's place.It was not even weird that I live here instead of him, it was by choice and I tried my best to make it happen. But with my parents, it was a coincidence. And I wonder if such coincidences still happen. (And I have a fair share of coincidences in life).

I miss you so much.  Our conversations about movies, about technology. Our eating at those ridiculous Gujju places. Our walks around (you are one of the few people in the world I have walked with). Your patience during all my shopping rounds (and bargaining)at Lokhandwala market. Your enthusiasm to try microwave recipes (desserts) and stuff me with them. Your excitement when I bought those regipallu  which reminded you of your childhood. Our bets on Cricket match outcomes and performances of players. Your silent but stern anger. Your kindness. Your affection. You not just calling me your daughter but treating me like one too. I am very thankful for your presence in my life, while I was growing up. I am thankful that I spent all those summers with you (watching chalti ka naam gaadi and talking about Bombay's nooks and corners countless times). I remember you everytime I think of Bombay when I see people solve crossword puzzles, and see new Gujarati food places th...

It's a movie that is based on a concept I have been speaking to people about over the past few days. It starts with a guy and girl falling in love based on their looks and first impressions. And evolves into so much more real and much more beautiful. And the music makes it immortal. Seventeen years later, it is still charming. And it has one of those set of tracks which I have never really removed from my playlist (not exaggerating.)