hmmm.....

I am not a big fan of change.Despite this, I genuinely believe that I accept it pretty decently. But over the last year and a half,the number of changes that are happening around me,are starting to overwhelm me.On so many different levels. I think,I no longer know what to do about it.(No,I do not want to 'change the change' but coping is becoming a little difficult.Still,I know I'll manage,but until then.Phew.)

Actually logged in to write a huge post,but sleep deprivation is making me feel sick and nauseated . So until I catch enough sleep.BBye.

What I both like and dislike about life,is that fact that it brings up the past and it is unpredictable. Yesterday,somebody whom I am not close to,but I do remember fondly,made my day.Just by one thought,one memory.I had a 'Its a Wonderful Life' moment. A year ago,I met a junior of mine LM.She is not pursuing a course at a well known institute in Pune and hopes to become an ace in her field some day.I have complete faith in her,I know she will make it big.I hope the best for her.She has always been a step ahead of a lot of people around her,whether she knows it or not.Now,in case you are wondering where I come into the picture.Apparently,I taught her the basics of what lead her to take up this course,sat all night so that she understood it and then she realised it was this area that she wanted to pursue. I remember helping others,but I didn't really remember this until she brought it up.Even after she did,the memory is only vague to me,but to her it is vivid.I have b...

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Ok,I believe that I get happy at small things.Thats how I am built.But that said,i get sulky also over small things. Especially considering,all the time they seem to happen only to me,at home. Dresses,things,food.Maybe I do not belong after all. As menial as it may seem to others,these are gigantic issues to me.I 'feel off' about them. Note to self: If this blog goes anymore sad,I shall delete it once for all this time around.

There are some scars in life that we cannot recover from.How much ever you try.No matter how much time is passed.However hard you try to move on,they come back to haunt you,in some form or the other. Today,it happened to me.Again.Yes,again.The day started out normally,little did I know that the end of the day will bring back those painful memories from my deep dark past. Should I say it is amazing,is that the right way to describe how all senses crawl back into your memories,with that one visual past?The smell,the feel,the air,the sound.How I wish we could bottle up some thoughts to be stored away,in an unreachable corner of our minds.A place where these maddening,deafening,hurtful memories,thoughts remain hidden forever.It started with a few words I hear over the television,something that I hardly watch these days.Then came the phone conversation,which made it worse.Why did I deserve this?For that matter,why did anyone who experienced this,deserve it?Some questions can never be ...

I am easily,one of the most selfish people I'll ever meet.